The Outside Reflects the Inside: A Stepmom’s Wake-Up Call

For years, I thought the issue was them.
My stepdaughters sent mixed signals.
My partner didn’t understand me.
I was at a breaking point.

What I didn’t realize was this:
Our relationships often mirror the relationship we have with ourselves.
And when I was disconnected from me — everything around me felt harder, heavier, and more hurtful.

There’s no rule book for how this is supposed to feel.
Just a swirl of mixed emotions, unspoken expectations, and fear - fear of hurting someone’s feelings, of saying too much, or not saying enough.
Sometimes, it felt like I was going to blow from everything I was holding in.

The hardest part?
Knowing that my stepdaughters should be at the center — but watching the adults (myself included) unknowingly make it about them.
About being right. About being heard. About being seen.

Truths got twisted — not maliciously, but through different lenses.
And when I tried to bring my own child into the picture, it felt like I was doing something wrong.
Like I had to hide my excitement. Or present my pregnancy in a way that made others comfortable.
It was confusing. Disorienting. Sometimes heartbreaking.

The turning point came when I realized I was constantly over-functioning.
Trying to “fix” the outside while quietly crumbling inside.
I didn’t trust myself.
I didn’t give myself space.
I didn’t even know what I needed.

It was really about me, not them.

Core Energy Coaching helped me see the patterns — the inner dialogue shaping my experience.
I got curious about the thoughts I was believing, the emotions I was suppressing, and the version of myself I had been editing for everyone else’s comfort.

It didn’t change overnight.
But once I started showing up differently — softer, clearer, more aligned —
everything around me slowly began to shift too.

For the last 16 years, I’ve done the inner work — not just shifting, but deeply transforming the way I see myself, others, and what’s possible.

It’s changed everything.

I now live and lead from a place of clarity, compassion, and truth.

I’ve been married for over 25 years, and today, I have strong, grounded relationships within my beautifully blended family.